Gratitude

A very special gratitude to all my friends who worked so hard to make me happy on my day.
I really didn't expect i'll hv so many happy returns on my 20th Birthday in a foreign land.

I had 2celebration here....
I listened to Birthday song for 3times...
...i am so grateful....
I made pumpkin pie....this is the 1st time i eat something made from pumpkin!
I played cut-hair game on my Birthday....!
I camwhored a lot!

I received a lot of warm wishes & blessings from everywhere....esp facebook.
I managed to reply all (almost)200 wishes..THANK YOU all of u!
My Facebook notifications started to work at 12thNOV@10am (US time) [13thNOV@12am(Msia time)]
Quote from someone, i have 36hours of Birthday instead of 24...
...counts from Malaysia time@the first second of 13thNOV till the last second of 13thNOV@US time.
As i said, i didn't expect much on my 20th Birthday.
But i do have an expectation for myself.....hopefully i can achieve my own 'expectation'.

Let's start from Malaysia:
Thank you mum for ur wishes....i've grown up, i'll be good over here.
Thank you little nephew for ur wishes....i felt so sad to hear ur cute little voice wishing me Happy Birthday....i miss u so much.=(
Thank you dad....tears rolled down my cheek when i saw ur message wishing me....this is the 1st time ever u wished me Happy Birthday throughout my 20years of life...
Thank you sis for the cute little message...
For all my friends & teachers & counsins in Malaysia, Thank you for ur lovely wishes on facebook.
I was on cloud 9 to see the increasing number of notifications that i had been receiving every 5minutes on average.
Thank you to someone special back in Malaysia...My heartbeat stopped for 3seconds for the surprise delivery...i am touched till i dunno what to say, words just couldn't get thru my mouth...

Now let's move on to the States:

I couldn't be possibly thank every single one of u here. I'm sorry for that.
But this post is specially dedicated to u....who is reading my post now!
Thank you for ur wishes...
Thank you for ur little gift...
Thank you for ur cards...
Thank you for remembering me...
Birthday celebration:
Thank you everyone who came to the party for me & Mernj, everyone who put in a lot of efforts trying to cheat us, everyone who cooked nice dishes, everyone for the warm wishes.........
Special gratitude to Chloe....Thank you. Thx to ur efforts & sweats & tears & bloods & dead brain-cells & anything & everything.
Not forgetting an old man which is 1day older than me!XD....Thank you for the 'dunno-what-name' cake, the scarf, & everything u've done to make me happy on my day....& luckily ur hair is safe!

a very special card for me
& the reddish string from roomie

blue-ish sweater from roomie tooo

full of wishes from everyone one of u

6 pages long....
i was laughing & crying at the same time looking at all these wishes

another special hand-made card from my sincere friend-Karisa

The drawing is awesome!
i LIKE it a lot!
Thank you Karisa!=)

Another special card from XiaoTing...
Thx a lot!

I am still so confused abt what is happening @.@

yEs i do feel the warmth.
This is a gift which traveled from another half of the globe!
Again...nothing else to say but THANK YOU...

little gifts...
muggy...
& scaft from MernJ


our muggies from JungHwa & Howard.
Thank you!

my gift to Mernj

^^

a cake baked by old man
=)=)

Thank you everyone for the yummy food!

Once again, Thx everyone for the party!=D

pumpkin pumnpkin pie Party!!!

2nd celebration with another Bday girl...Karen
...who has the same Birthday as i am=)

my victim..hehe

our new hair-style on our Birthday=)

That's all about my Birthday=)

It's the thought that counts!

Zillions of THANK YOU to all of u ARIGATOO GOZAIMASU!!!

moody Bday

It's early morning on my day....just another normal day
i sit by the window....staring at the sky & watching the raindrops....
trying to study for test but failed...
not knowing what to do....i spend my time drifting my mind away....
& continue to think a lot...
Sometimes i think too much....this is not good.

oH i HATE the weather!
i HATE rain since i was a kid!...
coz rainy makes ppl moody!...>.<
why do u wanna come to spoil my mood on my day!

Self-reflection

Today is a normal day like any other days...,
except that 13thNov1990 is the day i was brought into this colorful world.
It has been 20 years.
No more teens for me, i am considered as an adult now.

Birthday is not any unique day for me....i seldom celebrate it.
My first birthday celebration in my life was on my 19thBirthday.
Some ppl said is pathetic not to celebrate a day which only appear once in a year.
But i don't think so.
To me, other days too appear once, once in a year, & once in a life time.
So, Birthday is just a day.
But i am so grateful that i had my 2nd celebration in the States.
It's my 1st birthday in the States, gonna have 2more in the coming years.

On my birthday, i often think a lot.
I think of my parents who gave me the opportunity to be a part of this whole, to have known so many kind ppl who hv been helping me along, to have the chance to learn about so many new things, to have a chance to live.
I also think of myself, i reflected myself by going back into my deep memory as a child, a teenager, & as a 20-year-old adult.
All the memories of my past are flashing back thru my mind, those images are so vivid as if they've just passed by not long ago....
5-year-old me went to kindergarten,
6-year-old me performed Malay dance on the stage,
7-year-old me went to school on the 1st day & took a diagnostic test,
8-year-old me participated in sports competition,
9-year-old me was so nervous reciting english poem before a whole bunch of live audience,
10-year-old me was so sad for getting some 'red-marks' on my report card,
11-year-old me was a class monitor & a bad news hit me; poor me being diagnosed with some health prob,
12-year-old me did not study for UPSR & hence result is flunked,
13-year-old me transferred to another school without d companion of any primary school's fren; & being assigned to the lowest rank of class due to the flunked result,
14-year-old me stopped taking medicine & undergo the 1st surgery in my life; felt that i was at d edge of death coz being alone in surgical room was effing scary; & i received my Finals report card when i was lying on the bed after i woke up from the surgery,
15-year-old me went into the highest rank of class & felt SUCKZ to be surrounded by so many smart ppl; & 15-year-old me held a tiny little 1week old baby in my arms for the 1st time; that's my nephew who is now 5-year-old,
16-year-old me made a major decision not to be in Science-stream,
17-year-old me enjoyed the last year of my school life to the max!!!,
18-year-old me had a lot of nice memories & went to college for the 1st time,
19-year-old me started to enjoy & love my college life but too bad i gotta move to a whole new environment which is where i am right now.
20-year-old me is studying abroad, away from my place of origin, pursuing my degree & loving my life.
Thank you everyone who came across & left footprints in my life.
At this point of my life, i am so glad....& grateful for how i am now.
20years have gone....a lot has changed, & i am still changing, to be someone better.
I'm gonna appreciate everyone & everything which is given to me.

Everyday is a brand-new day,
Everyday is my Birthday as long as i am happy & live life to the fullest!....i am reborn everyday, reborn to be a better person!
When you were born, you cried and the world rejoiced.
Live your life so that when you die, the world cries and you rejoice.

I've officially HIT my twenties!
(i was hoping for a white birthday actually...too bad)
Anyway...........
Happy Birthday to me!!!

4Hours

4 more hours...
to say sayonara to the digit 1.....
I'm going to spend this last 4 hours scribbling whatever that comes into my mind...
Stay tuned for the next long post!








Oh btw....i would like to wish an old man.....
HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!! =P

lol

=)

成长

A very meaningful article about truth of life...

1.中学时我和同桌上课借过书，吵过架。现在我的旁边每节课是不同的面孔，打了招呼，下课却忘记了这张脸。

于是，我明白了，我在成长。

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------

2.父母送我去大学报到，临走的时候，我爸来和我告别，我问我妈呢，我爸说 “你妈怕你哭，就没来。”

大二暑假我回家，我爸无意中说 “其实你妈当时就在马路对面。你转身进学校，你妈就哭了。”

于是，我懂了，在成长面前，妈妈也是脆弱的。

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------

3.大学报到，我父母陪同，铺床、买用品。我有个室友，自己自己在那边铺床，后来我才知道他是自己来报到的，我很佩服他，也很佩服父母这么放得开孩子，自愧不如。

又一次吃饭，我和这个室友说，我很佩服你自己来学校。他说：

“你羡慕我独立，我羡慕你身边很温暖。”

然后，我懂得，当我看别人的时候，别人也在看我，为何我要忽略自己？

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------

4.大一的时候有一次拉肚子，给妈妈打电话不停的诉苦。

大二的时候我一个室友打球撞掉了一块舌头，缝上了有一段不能说话。后来我问他你妈知道么，他说没告诉，怕她担心。

于是，我懂了，我的痛哭会被距离放大，千里之外，妈妈比我更痛苦。

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------

5.大一下学期的时候给妈妈打电话，有段时间她没说几句就放了电话，她说她在忙工作。

寒假回家的时候我爸告诉我，其实妈妈那段时间正在住院，半个月里，每次接我电话之前，她就叫病房里的人不要说话，也不敢和我聊很长时间，怕露馅。

于是，我懂得，有时候隐瞒，也是一种爱。

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------

6.大学之前，自己只管学习，脏衣服一仍有人洗，饿了张嘴有饭吃。

那时候我还嫌衣服少，饭不好吃。

上了大学，看着床底下塞得一坨坨的脏衣服，捶了捶背只能继续一件一件的洗。

盯着食堂的饭菜，叹了叹气，只能硬着头皮放下咽。

于是，懂了，以为平平常常的东西，等自己完全承担了，就觉得不那么容易了。

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------

7.学校开学很早，基本过年之后过不了十五就要上学。

今年正月十五，和奶奶视频。

我说：奶奶，你看你孙子都长这么多胡子了。

我不知奶奶听见没有，她就在那边笑，我在这边却哭了。

于是，我懂得，时间和距离向前延伸，最终会失去些什么，所以要珍惜。

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------

8. 刚上大学的时候，我觉得自己是个异类：

晚上在走廊上校内，路人甲乙经过，大声说校内真无聊，然后我就赶紧把本合上了；

我在自习室吃椰浆饭，路人甲乙讨论，椰浆饭真垃圾，又没营养还有毒，我把半盒饭收到塑料袋里了；

我用电脑上MSN，路人甲乙又讨论，MSN真老土，我习惯Skype，我脸红的把MSN关了，说实话Skype咋用我都不知道；

我拿着4级单词背的使劲的，路人甲乙在旁边议论，我觉得GRE和TOFUL高分还是有规律的，我无颜的收起了英语单词本；

这个世界太多路人了，所以我更习惯走胡同，因为人少，但是胡同越走越窄，往往还是死胡同，所以只能靠边走马路，把中间让给浩浩荡荡的路人，但是在路边经常掉进下水道里，或者侥幸逃过井盖却不留神撞在了树上。

后来，看看自己，虽然没有什么大鸣大放，但我的大学生活同样让“路人”们羡慕。

于是，我懂了，好好走自己的路，使劲的跟着别人，弄不好就摔了。还是仔细认真的看着自己的路。

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------

9.中学时为了赖一会床，想尽各种理由请假，拉肚子、鼻子出血、感冒。。。但请假条落款都是我本人的名字。

上了大学之后不用理由，想睡就睡，点名让别人帮你划一笔，弄到最后，把自己的名字都弄丢了。

于是，明白了，担当啊，把责任放在身上，就明白了。

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------

10.高中的时候熬不住了就想再坚持一下，到时候考个大学上上就得了！

大学了，看着自己的专业，看看以前的同学出国的出国，奖学金的奖学金，然后开始骂自己，当初怎么不再多坚持一下。

于是，懂得了，人的确有无限的潜力，如果以现状看从前。

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------

11.上大学前生活在父母的臂膀下，看病可以走关系找好医生，上学可以走后门进好班，去哪里父母和朋友打个照顾就能得到照顾。

大学后父母罩不到我，去哪里不仅要排队，还要被强行插队。

于是，就懂了，常常自以为是，看不起父母，其实自己什么都不是。

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------

12.以前学习，半年一本书，然后还要好好保管，高考前还要重新看。书里的内容多年后翻看，还会有回忆。

大学之后，一学期一本书，用过之后就卖掉或放在某处，想想自己学过的书是什么样封面，没有什么印象。准备考研重新看的时候，感觉怎么都是新书。

于是，就懂得了，有时候，重复让人踏实，新鲜反而让人无感。

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------

13.硬着头皮进大学学设计，虽然在别人看来我这个学校的设计有多么多么负盛名，其实冷暖自知。刚上大学的时候我想出国，成绩不行想转专业，转专业未果准备考公务员，公务员考试越来越激烈越来越黑于是准备CPA。

开始我想环游世界，后来想赚大钱，后来想有稳定的工作，再后来希望顺利找到好工作。我的梦想在越来越萎缩，却被认为越来越实际，务实。

于是，我懂了，在现实和梦想之间，我们都是从梦想趋向于现实的以至于越来越偏离，等现实满足了，再看梦想，已经远的看不到了。

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------

14.大学之前，谈恋爱要偷偷摸摸的，遮遮掩掩，不能见光。

大学之后，单身的要偷偷摸摸，遮遮掩掩，不能见光。

于是，我懂了，有时候，合理不合理只是一线之隔。

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------

15.高中的时候老给老师起外号，私下里同学都这么叫。

大学了，想给老师起外号，却发现根本不知道老师名字怎么叫。

于是，懂了，有些幼稚的游戏，已经玩不下去了。

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------

16.刚上初中那年，Twins出道，青春可爱，不少同学是她们的粉丝。

高三那年，阿娇艳照门，偷偷摸摸各种搜集艳照互相传阅，很傻很天真，难以相信。

大二这年，阿sa宣布离婚，镜头前流泪，不舍婚姻。

于是，懂了，在成长的，不只我一个人。

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------

17.初一的时候，罗文去世。

初二的时候，张国荣从高楼跳下。

下一年某个英语课，用手机上网，知道了从小听到大的电台不再有梅艳芳的声音。

于是，懂得了，长大了，不知道有多少人要离我们而去。

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------

18.高中的时候能跑能跳都得憋着，能说会唱都得忍着，高考只考语文高数历史簿记地理化学物理生物。大家都是同一笼包子，看上去一样。

大学里，玩的就是素质，有特长就能独当一面，虽然进来的时候都是包子，但就看哪个包子褶儿多，哪个包子长得像汉堡，拼个性。

于是，懂了，就算自己哪儿都短，关键时刻还是得有一特长。

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------

19.高中的时候只能穿校服，走到哪年龄大的就叫我小弟，年龄小的就叫我学长。

大学没校服，地铁上三姑六婆都管我叫阿哥，初中生还喊我叔叔，还得硬着头皮答复。

于是，懂了，实质上，我们早就不是孩子了。

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------

20.高中时候看只看本地天气预报。

大学了看两个天气预报除了所在的城市，总也不忘看看家里的天气。

于是，懂得了，走得再远，还是挂念那个不怎么繁华的家乡。

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------

大学就是学会面对爸妈一点点老了，我们长大了，以为是somebody的自己变成了nobody也可以接受了。

大一，时间好多，多到不知道怎么安排

大二，烦恼好多，多到不知道怎么处理

大三，事情好多，多到不知道怎么应付

大四，纠结好多，多到不知道怎么放下

转眼间，大学毕业，参加工作

回首，发现回忆很多，

再回首，发现失落更多~~~~

其实有些还是对的，不过大学还是忙点好。不忙也是玩。

sky

Lying on the grass again...
staring at the same sky...
to relax my damaged brain before exam...


Today's weather is nice....
Beautiful sunshine with cooling wind...

My second-round of Marathon has officially come to an end!
Just left with tons of quizzes & homeworks to be done this sem.
There are 2 quizzes coming in this week...
looks like i can't take a break for now!
Anyway, i am glad.
=)

stAre

i stare at it...keep on staring at it...
wait...keep on waiting for it...
& i realized that i could do nothing except staring & waiting....
i am a failure....pathetic...